I was pissed off twice today.

I was pissed off twice today:

Incident number one.

I was at ENS (Electrical Engineering Dungeon) working on my resumé in the computer lab. After I was satisfied with a rough draft, I printed it out. I walked over to the printer to grab it, and by the time I walked back to my computer, there was a goofy-ass Asian engineer sitting there. He already logged me out and moved all my stuff aside. Then he looks at me and in that annoying FOB accent he asks, "Can I help you with something?"

Okay, who does that? Seriously, I was working on something, and this asshole decides he couldn't wait for me to finish my work. Logs me out, and touches my stuff.

I was so pissed off. So I ripped his glasses off his head and threw it across the room. Then I grabbed his greasy head, smashed it through the LCD monitor and took his Microelectronic Circuits book and beat him repeatedly with it. After I was sure he was dead, I peed on him, and told him he sucked and walked out.

Incident number two.

I was standing at Dean Keaton and Speedway waiting for the West Campus bus and listening to some Kanye West on the iPod. All of a sudden, I feel this tap on my shoulder. I turned and looked and this was this blond chick who just stared at me. I took off my headphones, and I said, "Sup, bitch?" To which she replied, "Yeah, excuse me, you're in my way."

Okay, the sidewalk is at LEAST two yards wide. I was standing close to one end, she could have easily walked around me.

I was so pissed off. So I belted her in the stomach, and kneed her in the head as she was bent over. Then I straddled her and threw some 'bows at her head UFC style. Needless to say, she bled profusely. I peed on her, told her she sucked, jumped on the West Campus bus and went home.


Justin said...

nice sam. regulate that bitch.

Ellen said...

haha, sam. you made me LOQ