the most coverage the history of 51st picks will ever get.

in the spirit of interesting names of 51st picks (shan is pronounced "shane"), i give you three more from drafts past:

1. JamesOn Curry, 2007 - who else was in the room with me that night when we thought that was a typo? wrong. not a typo, just retarded.

2. Lawrence Funderburke, 1994 - this one has always been a favorite of mine since i stumbled upon his basketball card as a kid. just say it out loud. it's fun!...derburke.

3. Spencer Dunkley, 1993 - i hope my future wife is okay with spencer dunkley lo. it's a damn shame he never made noise in the nba; what a waste of a name. should have been invited to be at least a judge in the dunk contest, if not a participant.

that's all i got. i still can't get over Dunkley though.

J-Ho can't stop partying...

At least this one is supposedly for a good cause...

Guess what?...OG Marquis Daniels will be there representin'. JHo also said that Kmart (Kenyon Martin) and Devin Harris will be there on K104 this morning. (Yes, I listen to K104 in the mornings in traffic hour...)

What do y'all think of Shan Foster? He seems like the athletic guard we desperately need that can shoot the 3 and throw down oops from Kidd. JHo obviously has his mind on other things and everyone knows Jerry Stackhouse is entering wash-up status.

Foster drops 42 on Miss State including 9 straight three-pointers

yellow fever?

after doing a search on wikipedia for sinophile, then doing the link clicking and going to yellow fever, then to asian fetishism, I finally arrived at the article for "rice queen." now i've never heard of this term, but it find it pretty funny. it's gay slang for a non-asian dude who wants the balls of an asian guy.

but that's not why i posted on this. my favorite part of this webpage is the hilarious slang at the end of the article:

"Other terms that refer to staples and are used in contrast to this term are "sticky rice" (Asian males who prefer other Asian males), "potato queens" (Asian men who prefer Caucasian men), "mashed potato" (Caucasian men who prefer Caucasian men) "bean queens" (men who prefer Hispanic men) and "refried beans" (Hispanic and Latino men who prefer other Hispanic and Latino men)."

hahaha sticky rice and refried beans. i've never heard anyone use these terms before. i must be out of the loop. though i don't think i want to be in that loop (no homo).

roy williams takes another hit.

edit: awwww dammit they changed it to the fake roy. and by fake roy, i mean dallas cowboy roy.

check out cowboy's safety roy williams' player card on espn.com. see anything wrong?

that's the wrong roy. i'm hoping it's because there's a funny guy at espn who realizes what a joke of a player he is, and has followed suit with his player card.

hilarious.

I now hate John Hollinger.

Caution to Mavs Fans:

This was on the front page of ESPN today.

On a lighter note, I finally found the YouTube clip of Sasha "The Machine" Vujacic after he was blown by the aging prehistoric Ray Allen.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FghxweP_HYg

Some staff dude reaches out to comfort him on his embarassing defense, and Sasha says, "F*ck man. [Kobe's gonna murder my ass once this series is over.]"

Free At Last!

ACQUITTED!
ACQUITTED!
ACQUITTED!
ACQUITTED!
ACQUITTED! (link)

Your boy Kells is back for good to keep cranking out those hits! Justice has been served! Seriously good news for all over the age of 15!

Why Henry is the man (by not working for the Man)

via Henry Tsui's Facebook

Taking procrastination to the next level...

Written by Lydia! I don't know why she didn't post this! So, I'll do it... per Andrew's request!

I wrote this the morning of my last exam...hence the title. Totally forgot about it once summer commenced. Thanks for reviving it.

"Beast" - the 6 headed guitar. Taking compensation to an undiscovered level.

XXL Foosball Table. Taking boring soccer games to an even more boring level.

I would probably cry if I see this in real life, either from laughing or horror. Taking wedding proposals to the 1337><012z level.

Big Lo's Ultimate Fantasy.

Art installation by two dudes named Fabien Giraud and Raphael Siboni. It's supposed to be some sort of slightly modern (Star Wars is like 30 years old...) interpretation of the Chinese Terra-cotta Army from the Xi'an dynasty. (link)

I just thought that many Darth Vader masks looked cool. Keep it in your pants, Andrew.

nba finals thoughts

i'll be commenting on other folk's posts on my own posts...cause i still can't comment in china. excellent posts by justin and enoch; have yet to check out the domo arigato post. yums and anti-energy drink = hilarious. obama = back to his roots. what kind of comments did you get on your houston post sam? lol hope you find something to do there. 'stros games? hahaha.

nba finals dilemma: who do i cheer for? i really didn't want boston to win the championship, so i thought i might cheer (maybe not so much cheer, but would rather have them win) for the lakers. but then i remembered,"wait, i fucking hate the lakers and have so for the entirety of my life." i mean, i like watching and being amazed by kobe just as much as any other nba fan, but i hate them. i mean, i come from the place where hack-a-shaq originated! so i guess the best i can hope for is a strike happening tomorrow, with no resolution to the finals. nba players union, make it happen!



anyway, onto my thoughts after the first two games of the nba finals:

1. defense beats offense? i think we're almost at the point of turning this into actual legislation (pats/giants anyone?). gotta have something to rely on when the shots arent falling.

2. brian scalabrine gets the most action he sees all playoffs...when he gets to carry paul pierce off the floor and into a wheelchair. google image this ginger. he looks like an oversized leprechaun. check out his wikipedia profile picture. hilarious. (i'm on another computer that uses only chinese...thus i dont know which one to choose to copy link image...embarrassing). and for the first time all year, the press goes to him for his reaction.

3. speaking of paul, first thing i thought about his injury wasnt that it was inspiring, but that it just might be a load of crap. yeah his comeback from injury was inspiring, yeah he made a few threes after coming back, but...he was gone for a minute and a half. he crumpled to the floor in EXCRUCIATING!!!!!!!!! pain, has to be carried by TWO teammates and placed onto a WHEELCHAIR (which reminds me of dwyane wade injuring his shoulder...and having to use a wheelchair. what?). so back in the locker room, doctor says (and i'm sure this is exactly how it went), "hey dude, get up and test out the knee." he gets up, tries some lateral movement, slaps on a sleeve on his right leg, and whaddya know? he's as strong as ever. that's some karate kid bullshit right there, except mr. miyagi isn't alive anymore (pour out a little liquor).

the point is, dont you dare compare him to willis reed, who played with a torn thigh muscle. and after seeing him go 9-16 for 28 points in game 2, i'm even more skeptical of his "sprained knee." do you know why we call him paul pussy pierce (or for shorthand, triple p)? cause that's exactly what he injures: his pussy.

4. on a related note, a priceless quote from celts coach doc rivers:

"A guy grabs his knee, you know, there's no good thoughts. Honestly I thought the worst. When they carried Paul off -- I've had the injury, I've seen it -- I just assumed it was the knee."

yeah, you usually assume that when HE GRABS HIS KNEE. i guess that's why they call him "Doc."

5. pau's numbers aren't pedestrian, per se, but his production against truly good teams has not been all that great. played well in game 1 against the spurs, but it seems like they figured him out after that (at least on the offensive end). and he's played just ok against the celtics. now i havent been able to watch any of these games so i can't attribute this to anything specific, but i thought that was at least worth mentioning.

6. More of those friendly wagers on sports championships between governors. Not really noteworthy, until i came upone this: "Schwarzenegger has promised to donate locally grown California food and wine to a charity of Patrick's choice." So which charity needs wine? one for homeless people perhaps? or maybe it's for the kids. or maybe they mean the wine is for charity functions, where rich people sip wine and make themselves feel good about...themselves.

7. for all my talk about the west being a beast these last 7 or 8 months, i'm pretty embarrassed. the west playoffs were pretty lame for the most part, and things are lookin grim for the lakers in the finals. what does that tell us? nothing, except that sports are unpredictable, and it's probably a waste of my time to read analyses and tout my own ideas on a blog lol.

by the way, a little over two weeks in, the mustache is horrible. you either don't notice it, or you notice it enough to know that i'm not capable of growing a righteous mustache. this has been the low point of my time in china hahaha. pics coming after my third week.

a lot of sports ranting.

wrote most of this sometime last week...

would you like to suggest any proxy websites to me or some other way to undermine the chinese government?

lydia needs to go back and post the "taking procrastination to the next level" draft. good stuff. had myself a good laugh. enoch will appreciate the foosball table lol.

"All that bullshit-ass calls they had out there. With Mike [Callahan] and Kenny [Mauer] -- you've all seen that shit," Wallace said. "You saw them calls. The cats are flopping all over the floor and they're calling that shit. That shit ain't basketball out there. It's all fuckin' entertainment. You all should know that shit. It's all fuckin' entertainment."
-rasheed wallace (with my interpreting where [expletive] was written in)

o rly?!?!?!? old news for mavs fans everywhere, or anyone who has been wronged by manu gifloppili, and more importantly, dwyane "phantom foul" wade (seriously, did his mom have dyslexia? can someone verify this for me?).

on a similar note, the league decides that it will start to fine the floppers next year. i bet that'll turn out great. how do you gauge the degree of floppy-ness (no homo)? this new policy is stupid, and i hope it fails. shouldnt this just be up to the referee's discretion?...

...oh wait...we have these kinds of things cause refs suck. funny that joey crawford was at the center of the one of the more obvious foul calls known to man (could it be anyone else? maybe bennett salvatore). i hate defending the spurs, but derek fisher jumping on brent barry (still cracks me up that he won a dunk contest)? that was a black on white crime, one step away from being able to be legally prosecuted. that's reffing 101 dude. yeah yeah yeah, shot clock should have been reset for the lakers on the previous possession, but cmon. this one was way more obvious. that's taking "let the boys play" to an extreme. and btw, stern-inator, i'm still waiting for my apology for the 2006 finals. still waiting...and waiting...

lakers and celts in the finals? fine, both great teams. but what a fucking set up by the league. they're loving every second of this. i become more and more skeptical with each season. i think it's a by-product of being a mavs fan. thank god the nba is currently banned from tv in china (bc of recent criticism by players on tibet and sudan; edit: ban was uplifted before the finals), or else i'd be pummeled by ridiculous comparisons of the old 80's celts/lakers rivalry (can't really categorize the even older lakers/celts matchups as rivaly...more like a pummeling) and this years finals. dont even try. that was a rivalry too intense for this to even come close to comparing and has nothing to do with this finals, except for sharing the same team names. sensationalism in sports coverage (or just mainstream news in general) is a disease.

as a side note, can we start making bets on when the knicks will become successful again? when does stern secretly demand teams trade their respective superstars to the knicks, a la the celts? there is no way the sonics and timberwolves both didnt know of the other trade happening. there had to have been other offers (though to be fair, al jefferson will be a beast, and i guess the sonics garnered some extra cap space too). was this not a case of mchale giving a nod to his former nba alma mater? that's as close to a superstar monopoly as you could get in the nba. dont give me this "these players have been loyal to us for a long time so we'll give in to their demands" bullshit. this is still a business, dammit. (and yeah...cause the sonics ownership is the perfect example of an organization run with integrity.) or do the knicks get to trade bullshit for a legit star player, like kwame brown for pau gasol? we get investigated for stack's "i'm staying here" comments, but nothing is said about a retarded turd (makes damp look like shaq; ask justin how kwame takes care of himself) being traded for a player who actually knows what basketball is? i say the knicks are back in the next 2-3 years. once again, i'm probably angry just cause im a mavs fan.

anyway...

stupid article, but there are some encouraging quotes from jkidd. maybe old age and his crazy bitch-ass ex-wife have mellowed him out. even after this season i still love jason kidd, and unless carlisle is playing everyone for fools, i think we're heading in the right direction. more mavs in a post called mavs eulogy 2008 that i've had saved as a draft for a month now...should be out any day now haha.

for future reference, espn writer jemele hill is seriously a terrible writer, and anything she writes should never be taken seriously. i've read a few of her articles (way more than i should have read), and all she writes is fluff, while constantly contradicting herself. barely anything she writes is based on fact, and it just seems like she makes shit up. horrible. i know espn thought they could knock out two demographics with this one, hill being both black and a woman (thus having twice the "attitude;" after reading her articles and getting a sense of her writing style, i get the feeling that's what espn wanted her to come across as), but the fact of the matter is that this has nothing to do with race or gender. she just sucks at research and writing.

ok i feel much better. really, i'm not this angry all the time.

Pound.

This picture of Obama giving his baby mama a dap does more for me than any 'rhetorical masterpiece' he's given. Let's hope this is what the campaign, and hopefully the Presidency, will represent.

Give 'em something McCain don't know nothing about.

Drank.

Ahh... hip hop: the ultimate capitalists.

This is apparently HUUUUUUGE in Houston (check it for me, Sam). It's supposed to imitate the effects of lean without the actual cough syrup illegalness. And apparently it's great with vodka too. (link)

Check the hilarious press release:

From design to production, every aspect of this calming drink was inspired by today’s popular hip hop artists who embrace the much sought-after hip hop lifestyle that encourages people to capture a stress-free state of mind.

Now if that isn't some marketing bullshit, I don't know what is.

quick review on the new weezer album.

huge weezer fan here. got hooked on "buddy holly" and haven't stopped since.

quick recap of past albums: blue and pinkerton are two of the best albums ever in my book, green was charming in it's own machine-created pop music kind of way, maladroit was not too bad and i actually enjoyed the little bit of a harder edge on that album, and make believe had a couple of stand out tracks, but overall was not that good.

so, after my first listen through weezer's new semi self-titled album (the red album), i can say that at this point in time, it's ok i guess. i really like the first three songs, the last song is good, as is the extra track on the UK version, a cover of "the weight" by a band called the band (though i will try to find the deluxe version of the album with 4 extra tracks. dont know if that'll be a challenge to find in china or not). the rest is just either average or ehhhh. i can tell that maybe a couple more will grow on me, but out of 10 =w='s, i give it 5.5 for a few great tracks, and a average to decent effort from weezer all around.

also boosting this score is the insane sing-along-ility (i'm amazing with words) of the chorus of the lead single, "pork and beans." love this track, and i wish more of the album was like this. i could definitely see myself smashed and incoherently singing along. check out the video, i thought it was amazing, and at the least, it's very entertaining.



big fans of weezer will appreciate the ever-changing rivers cuomo element of the music (let's face it, he is weezer. as he goes, so does the band). it's kind of hard to explain how i feel about it without first explaining the long and complicated history of weezer (and i dont want to take the time to do that), but i can say that even if he's not making the best music of his career, i'm happy for what he's doing now, while still being able to produce a few hits. i'm sure this paragraph didnt make sense to anyone i know, except for jesse smith, who i know doesn't read this.

in semi-related news, and based on pure coincidence (i've had this planned for a coupla months), for the hell of it, i am in the midst of seeing if i can grow a mustache, maybe one similar to rivers. i'm asian, so stay tuned.

no matter what, i'll always =w= weezer.

jj cries about his time in dallas.

not literally though. read it if you want, but it's not that interesting, and i'm about to sum it up for you anyway.

i'm gonna go ahead and preface my commentary by guessing that jj, roy, and greg ellis hung out with each other and often liked to consult with each on how to cry the best.

mental notes i made while reading this less than compelling story:

1. "the man who had started 39 consecutive regular-season games for the Cowboys." rofl.
2. "chip on my shoulder" is an overused phrase and overestimated motivational factor (at least when referring to someone doing you wrong). it's kind of superficial. real superstars never get comfortable, no matter the situation. that's why they're the best. they don't need to prove to anyone but their harshest critic (themselves) that they are the best.
3. "[The Barbarian] averaged about three more carries per game than Jones, gaining an additional 1.2 yards per carry (4.8 to 3.6)." 1.2 more yards per carry? that's huge. rarely do playoff teams average less than 4 yards per carry. in a so-called "game of inches," even 0.4 more yards is a big difference. in that respect, jj was less than adequate.
4. Two quotes from jj: 1) "The way I feel about being a running back is, everybody in the NFL can run the ball. There are a select few that will stick their nose in there and be willing to stand up to a Julian Peterson or a Lofa Tatupu. I think that separates the men from the boys." 2) "Some guys are this, some guys are that and some guys are just football players. I'm a football player." call me a negative nancy, but let me interpret these statements for you: jj is just making comments to veil his deficiencies, namely his main job, running the ball. don't get me wrong, he was a pretty decent blocker. but you know what really separates the men from the boys? production.
5. "I've been playing for a while and I've proven myself. When given the opportunity, I make things happen. I just want an opportunity. That's all I want." First, proven what? i hope he meant in HS and college, cause he was not at all what the cowboys had hoped he would become. his flashes of brilliance encouraged the cowboys to hold on a little longer, but his injuries and the emergence of the Beast were enough for us to say bye to half of our rb duo and then immediately replace him (i'm super excited about felix). we gave you the opportunity dude, and you didn't really make things happen.
6. "All I know is what Julius can do," [JJ] said, "and he can do a lot. He is a big-time back." HAHAHA laughable. of course, the comment itself is ridiculous, but what cracked me up is him referring to himself in the third person. referring to yourself in the third person is reserved for only the best athletes, or at the very least, the crazies. he is not the first option, so maybe he's the second.
7. caught this user comment on the article: "Man he said this same stuff when Parcells left. Then he got out on the field did the same thing he was doing when Parcells was there. If Barber taking your position carry by carry did not inspire you then moving to Washington is not going to do it." this is very true. what could be more motivating than holding the fakest "starting" title in sports (only rivaled by whoever fills in for ginobili in the starting line-up)? that's a diss. i wish him all the best, and he certainly has had his flashes of brilliance, but he certainly could not be a featured back, much less a workhorse. he just doesn't have it.
8. i really miss football. a lot. i cannot wait for this coming cowboys season.
   

A roflcopter Ad

I'm never going to buy a Citizen watch. This is definitely roflcopter material. That's a face of a SUPERBOWL winner. Unstoppable.

Yums

Yums - The New Street Shoe

http://www.yumsshoes.com/index.html

Y'all should check this site out. It's hilarious. OG Marquis Daniels is on it fa sho. I remember the days when I saw him and J-Ho on Apple Orthodontics commercials...